Call the Police?

I was reading a story on someone page about calling the police, and I do not call them; I do not care what the reason or what is going on; I do not call the police as I do not trust them; black, white, brown, or yellow; they all police to me.

True story, when Joyce attack Danny in my house I called the police and I was arrested and taken to jail; everyone in my house knew the truth, but I was still taking to jail and when I asked the Black officer why I was going to jail; his words to me I shit you not; because I was the only man at the house.

Next true story, I made a complaint on that office, and he and a white one made my life a living hell I still filed more complaint. I was pulled over by the white one and was taken to jail for having an Illinois driving license with the name Mahdee Muhammad on it.  Once more, I shit you not, I was charged with having a fake ID. They said I had not legally changed my name.

They pull over was on some bullshit and I got sick during the stop, and per the ambulance driver, the officer and other police were talking about how he needed to justify the pullover. I told you all about the black officer that was not only his supervisor; however, he is a member of Alpha Phi Alpha Frat Inc. (that I had personal dap months before)

They all stood there and made up something to charge me with, and that was the story this is the story they came up with. The officer saw me pulled over sick, and he was there to help me and found out I had a fake ID. If this were not 100% real, some would say that I was making this up.

I had to go to Markham court seven different times over a year before the State of Illinois drops the case.  I had my birth record, my passport, and school record and legal document all to show my name is Mahdee Muhammad, and none of that made one dam difference They only drop the case because they could not get the officer to come to court.

This story is one of the many bullshits I had to deal with when it came to Joyce and the case with Zion and a dirty cook county police, black and white.  For these reasons, I do not call the police as I do not trust them. One of my bros asked the question since he is a police officer now and does that make him different now; for me, that would be a Yes.

You see, I know many police; shit I have one that is like a brother to me, and I know in my heart, in the end, he is police and when on the line, will he support me or his so-called brother in blue and I do not know. What I do know is that I am a black man in America, and I am always going to be one, and for that reason alone, my life is not worth a bucket of warm piss.

The sad part of all this is the fact that as a black man, I fight with black women and men about being black and how I need to forget and forgive as life is too short. I am one black man that does not fear the brothers on the street; I fear those who are police and who think they are not black anymore.

As these black folks do not think they are black anymore; they have somehow overcome their blackness

I get more help from non-black than blacks people; I have more non-black that feel my pain as to many that look like me feels that I need to forget; wow, let that sink in! When you or anyone question my blackness, just know that I will never forget that I am a field negro,

I do not pretend or do I want to be a house negro; as in the end, we all are still just Negros in Master's eyes.

Where are the Black Fathers at?

As I review all these stories in the news about black men being kill, I keep asking the question, where are the fathers at?

We have a problem, and it is nothing new; there are too many young men coming up without a father or father type in their life.

I have been going over in my mind how do I address all the bullshit with Zion; I have done my best to bit my lip and keep my feelings to myself; however, it is about time that I make this clear.

There is nothing; not one thing in this world that is going to keep me from having a father to son talk with Zion when he turns 14 in August. The games that have been played with this young man are criminal in nature and sick in others. Zion is living in a house of prison, and he will know that he does not have to live that way.

To have him begging for love, to want to see his family, and to be lied to time after time breaks my heart. Zion graduated from 8th grade, and he is going to high school in the city, and we are going to get him a laptop and some clothes (he does not and should not have to beg or get anyone hand out cloths). I was told to take the laptop over to someone's house, and Zion might get his birth mother to takes him to get it.

I said HEL No! I am going to send it to him or put it in his hands and let him know do not let anyone take it or sell it. Enough is enough and too much cause the cycle of crazy to never stop. I see and hear about what is being done and how people in my family walk on eggshells as to just see his face or hear his voice is enough for them to pretend this shit is healthy for him.

Fact: Zion had his childhood stolen from him and like it or not; he is about to be a man, and I can live with what I have and will do for him. I do not look back over the years and have any regret as I did all in my power to make sure that he had a life.

I watch his great-grandfather and great-grandmother go crazy; I saw personally how his grandmother would think that she talks to dead people and was not shocked when she was committed to a mental hospital.

What did these people think; that Zion was not going to grow up, that he was going to eat the lies told to him. Like those lock up, he had to survive; he had to play the game, and just as anyone that is held against their will, he had to survive.

Our ex-slave master destroyed black people, and we have allowed their children to do it to us. I only want my children to be better than I; I want them to reach for the starts on my back. In the 14 years of Zion's life, Joyce has cost my family and I over $200k, and I am never going to forget or forgive her. What she did to Zion was never done in love; she does not know how to love as she was never taught what love is.

We have to stop this cycle, I bit my lip about the bullshit that my family has done to me; I bit my lip about the fact that I did not put my hand on David, he wanted me to be a nigga and lay hands on him, and I did my best to let the white man laws do my fighting, and that was dumb for me to think that laws written for him could be used for me.

Let me be clear as I can; we do not have a justice system; that is justice for black people; history shows that we, the ex-slaves, keep looking for justice from a group of people that hate us. My soul cries for my people as I know we are sick, and we are not going to get the help that we need.

I was talking to someone about hate, and they were saying to me that I should forgive those that have caused me harm. I told them BULL; I am a black Jew, and like my Jewish brothers, we do not forget or forgive. I take my hate to the grave.

Do you see clear folks saying they forgive those that do them wrong; hell no; they made a death penalty just for them. Dr, West said it best; Clear folks better be happy that black folk do not do onto them as they did onto us.

However, it will come a day that we will seek a tooth for a tooth!

Broken Dreams

When you were a baby, I gave you my word that I would love and protect you from harm as if you were from my seed; I told you that I would make sure that you were always treated the same, and if you wish for it, it would be yours.

I am sorry that I was not able to keep my promise as I trust a system that I knew was never made to give a black child a chance.  I allow a person to get their hands on you as their only thought was and is always how they can survive. And if they had to live a life of poverty, you should have to live one also.

What is the love of a parent if they do not wish more for their child; what is the love of a parent if they have jealousies in their heart and soul for a child that they birth; as lies can be told over and over but the trust is one that sees its way into the light. 

I gave all the men in my family my world that you would grow up to break a cycle that many who came before you were not able. The cycle of not having a father in your life that loves you; the cycle of not being able to do the little things like play baseball; and growing up in a house under the thumb of a government program.

I can talk about what the numbers show; however, what are numbers as it is those that will say they are not valid. I can talk about what life is like to grow up poor; however, that is a life that I personally do not know.

So, what can I talk about?  I will make sure that when you become a man, you know the truth. I will make sure that you know you know why you were robbed of your youth.  You will understand why you became a tool used for section 8, the day that I gave my life so that you could have one, the day that racism was so intense that these so-called laws of justice were blind, you will know that on 5/30 that you were stolen from your family like a slave.

I am not going to bit my lip or tap dance around the truth I am not going to sit here and play nice just to stroke the ego of a crazy person, I will never forget or will I forgive what they did to you and why. As a young man, you should never have to see the things that you are going through now. No young black man should. You are and have become a stat, one that says that you will be in jail or dead by the time you reach 18th.

Your life will never be the same; you will not get the chance to see things the same way; you will not get the opportunity to live out your dreams. You now live a life that is based on the first of the month. Your health now is cover by a state that does not care about you as they only see a future DOC draft choice. I dare anyone to say that these numbers are a lie; let someone tell me that your odds in life were made better by the decision of a racist.

My soul is substantial, as I knew never to bring you back to this state. I was told that justice is not and will never come from here; fight for you in the south. You had a better chance at life in a state where those that came before you were slaves than in one where so-called free men walk. 

You wanted so much from life, and you had a family that was going to do all that they could to make sure that you have it, but I fail to keep you safe. I allowed you to be sold on the slave block as the Judge said that was the life you will live now.

I play over and over in my mind what I could have done differently; what could I had done to keep you safe and as a man that keeps me up at night unable to sleep, as I see the life that you live. I understand that no one gives a dam about you, as they only see you for what they can get from you. No child should be the life support of their parent. No young man should become the man of the house. I am sorry that you have been put into that position.

You now live in a concrete jungle, one that is made like a jail, your phone calls are monitoring like those young men in the other world locked-up, as you are living in prison; and in a house that is set up for you to end up in real one.

You are a smart young man, and I am sure that you have learned to survey as you told me you were going to have to do. You know that it is better to play dumb than to be smart, as being smart will get you called names, or cost you your life.

I might not know a lot, but what I do know is what it is like to grow up to learn that the person who talks about how much they love you; lied to you. I understand why your mom doesn’t speak as she needs those 5 min calls to make it. I would refuse to talk to you that way. I was told lies as a young man that sounded good, but I became a man; and I will never forgive those that lied, as I am sure you will never.

I give you my word, and my word is bond that before I leave this earth, I will never let those that put you into this place of hell forget what they did to you. You have about four more years max, and one with good behavior and you will be FREE from your bondage as you can seek early release. 

Operation "Bayonet"

Forgiveness is something that is not for me to give, and it is not something that I will do. I am up reading about how the Nazi hunters would travel the earth looking for anyone that profit or help to destroy Jews. I ask this question for those that tend to forgive so easy, and they also just happened to be the descendants of slaves; why?

Have you all been that brainwashed into a feeling that it is your “God” that taught you or told you that it is better to forgive, as I have read the bible and I have not been able to find those words. I did come across the lyrics that talk about an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth; however, I miss that slap my face, and I turn the other cheek part. As brother Malcolm talks about this, and I will sum it up, slap my face, and I will break your hand.

Well, what was done to Zion; what was done to my family was more than a slap in the face; It was and is a Judicial Lynching, and I am not their “God,” nor am I in the position to forgive anyone of them. I am more like Simon Wiesenthal, and less like a Booker T. Tell me that something terrible has happened to one of those that stood in a courtroom using that so-called justice to lynch me; I am going to smile and sip me some tea

Life or death is all that we have, and what we do in the middle is on us. What David Gotzh did was brag to me about his German background. He was proud to let me and others know that I was nothing but a nigga to him, and Zion was nothing but bait use to go nigga hunting. Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan brag about how she could use her powers to lynch me in the courts, and I had no ability to do anything about it.

When this is over, and at some point, the government will say that it is; I am not going to go away; I am not going any dam where. I told them, and I made it clear; I am going to take this fight to my grave. The powers that be do not give a hoot if you all live or die as you are nothing but a number on a sheet of paper; the sad part about this is that when this is over, I wonder how many of you keep on being just a number.

I say do some reading into history and understand how the church and a fear of “God” were used to keep blacks in a mental slave state. To this day, many of you are still in that mindset; we have these so-called Negro leaders who have one job, and that is to keep one foot on our backs to keep up in place. These so-called slave catchers, as the real ones look like the same slaves they were catching, are used to keep black people down.

We tend to look at these young folks and question why and how; they are walking about as if they have nothing to live for; no, they understand that at one date and time, they are going to leave this world, and they are never coming back. Well, I know that also, as such, I have to do all in my power to make sure that no other black child or man is lynch like Zion and my family was. Wake up and understand that It is your “God” job to forgive, not mines! And, I sure in hell, do not forget.

I am still here! Operation "Bayonet”

Million-Dollar Blocks

The million-dollar block is where CVLS David Gotzh said was an up and coming block that would give Zion the life that he needed and deserved. Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan, under the supervision of Chief Judge Evans has spent years making sure that young black boys like Zion help to make sure that more million-dollar blocks are made.

What is a million-dollar block? Millions allocated to incarcerate residents on individual city blocks. In Chicago, over five years from 2005-2009, there were: 851 blocks with over $1 million committed to prison sentences 121 blocks with over $1 million committed to prison sentences for non-violent drug offenses.

79th and Essex are one, and this is where they sent Zion to live. I know that for many of you, this is something that is hard to understand as you feel that this issue does not affect you. That is until you are looking down the other end of a gun, and you ask yourself how? We have a court system in place in cook County that has one purpose; that is to lock up and send as many young black males downstate. 

If these were not black boys, something would be done; if you took the time out of your day to go and spend one hour in a courtroom, you would see that judges like Susan Kennedy-Sullivan are not trying to help as these same judges have stock in the prison system.

Nowhere is this nation is the schoolyard to prison pipeline clearer than in Chicago:

Not only are the highest incarceration rates concentrated on the city’s west and south sides, but this spatial unevenness has held constant for more than two decades. 1 As a result, most urban residents with felony convictions come from and return to a small number of neighborhoods. The impact on residents is dramatic. In parts of Chicago’s West Side, nearly 70 percent of men between ages 18 and 54 are likely to have been subject to the criminal justice system

What does Chief Judge Evans has to say about this; nothing; as he has for over one-year, refuse to talk with me about this; and since no one in the so-called media cares enough to ask the critical question this goes unchecked.

Slaver has not ended as these young men of color are sent back down to the southern part of the state as these small towns make they're living off the backs of young blackbucks.

The reason we have a probate court for minor was to help keep these young people out of DCFS and out of the systems. However, under Judges like Susan Kennedy-Sullivan, over 80 percent of black males that go through the probate court end up at some point in their life going into DCFS and the DOC system. Over 80 percent, that is a system that is and will keep on failing as it was never set out to succeed. 

If you want to read more about this and if you think this is not real check out the https://chicagosmilliondollarblocks.com/

As you will see that when a young man pulls up in a car and unload 20 rounds into a store; these young men are a product of cook county probate court; under Chief Judge Evans; and highly unqualify judges such as Susan Kennedy-Sullivan and lawyer like CVLS David Gotzh are tools used to keep the constant cycling of black men in and out of prison in neighborhoods like the block were Zion was sent to live.

Raciest Judges

The sad part is that this is not new, and it has been going on for some time. I talk about David Gotzh and Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan and how it is a fact that David is a racist, and he has no problem using the word nigga or talking about black folks like that were as he called them “gang-banger thugs”!

You see, to be a lawyer with CVLS and a racist is OK; after all, when I beg CVLS to take him off Zion case, they just up the game and told him not to stop until he destroys that little black boy. Now, Good old Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan talks about how the life of education and making something out of your life is not the life for little black boys. No, for her, it is jail and the grave.

I'm not too fond of the fact that we live in a society where race is more important than anything else, where the first thing anyone sees when they look at me is my skin. That saying that my skin is my sin is so true. Can I wake up one day and not be in my skin; can I wake up one day and the world sees me a White man. Where I a not pre-judge or have to worry about having my life taking away just because my skin is not light enough.

On February 27, 2020, I go before a cook county judge in the 6th district as CVLS has done all that they can to keep what they did to Zion in the dark. They have hired one of the best law firms in the state to fight me; that is right; I am no one, I am just a black man that can read and write. And some years ago, that fact alone would have got me killed. Today it got me lynched in Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan courtroom as she said to me, I think I am so smart as she taught me what they do to smart nigga in cook county courts.

If I were a fly on the wall, I would love to see what David Gotzh and CVLS said about me in emails and text, as that is why they are fighting so hard to keep my case from seeing the light. To read the emails, to get a look into the racist world of cook County probate court and see how young black boys are sold each week to the highest bidder.

Judge Leblanc is just one of many that sit on a bench with hate inside of them for others; this hate is only based on race. You see, a racist with no power hurts no one but themselves; however, those like David Gotzh and Judge Kenney-Sullivan and Judge Leblanc can hurt many young blacks’ boys and girls that cannot fight for self.

Many do not know that there is a difference in being a racist and being prejudice; the critical factor is power; one has the power, and the other does not. As such, I am just a spider on the wall, and I fight an uphill battle to bring some light into cook county probate court as there are too many black folks that know what is going on; but they are making too much money to say anything.

Butterfly Effect.

Watching the Hernandez story, I do not get all the gay points as besides the high school person, there is no one to say that they were with him or that he was gay, and that has nothing to do with this story.

Now, what does is the fact that I talk and live by the butterfly effects; it is only one thing or one second or one point in your life that will or can change your life forever. His father died at a point where it changed his life forever, and it was at that point all the things that happen in his life was going to be.

I speak over and over about Zion and how it was just one; only one person that changes his life for life. David Gotzh! This man came into Zion's life and changed his life in a way that was not good. I wonder how he would had felt if ARDC had taken his law license from him. How would that hand change his family life; would he be able to live the life that he lives now; would his children have the life they have now?

I speak about Zion and how this young man had a gift, and that was his love for baseball, and it was our job to make sure that he was able to be the best that he could; it was our job to make sure that not only did he have that; also education had to be there. I get so mad when I think about how Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan spoke about how educated Zion is, and she still chooses to send him to live in hell.

I see it so many times; how young black and brown boys have their lives destroyed by a system that is not and was never put in place to help them. Tell me this; how cook county probate or for that any court in American helps them. Locking up young black and brown boys do not help them as there is no system in place to help them.

I know that I have this uphill fight. I know that I am only a fly on the wall as I must fight a system that makes millions off black and brown boys. There is this meme going around about the fact that police do not want crime to go down; doctors do not want people to stop getting sick, and those that make their living off the jails do not want people; esp. black and brown boys/men to stop getting lock up.

I say take any young non-black or brown child and put them into some of the positions that children like Zion must live in now and tell me how their life will be totally different. What makes David children any better than mines, RACE! The issues with Zion and all these other throws away, children are all about race and how raciest do not see them as being equal to theirs.

I fight this battle not to prove a point; it is not about the money; it is about bringing an end to a system that is and has been in place too long. CVLS knew that they have a racist working under their wings, and all they cared about was how can they destroyed another black child. I know that my stories are the same as many others; I know that most if not all of you all don’t care as these young men story do not affect your life; never forget the butterfly effect.