Dream Killers!

 

It has been just over two years since Zion life was changed, and it was not for the best; it was only for one main reason, and it is this reason why I can say that I will never in my lifetime forgive those that had a hand into what was done to him. I cannot say that I wish well on them, as I do not. I wish them the same pain that Zion has to live with; I wish they live with a loss so bad that it makes them wish they were no longer alive. Yes, I carry this feeling of intense hate, and sorry it is not going anywhere.

My feeling comes from seeing how as a black man, I have to cry at the state of black Americans; it brings tears to my eyes that so many years after being placed into the chains as slaves, we have not advanced as we are still slaves. I have been looking to see what has become Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan; who life has she fucked up? I have been looking for news on David Gotzh as I am sure that he is still the world's worst lawyer who should have been disbarred; however, those working at CVLS made sure that did not happen.

CVLS; a system that is only around because young black children are being destroyed by a court system whose sole purpose is to make sure more young black boys never make it. How dare does a Chief Judge Evans talk about all that he has done; this man is no better than a Justice Thomann’s; to tell the truth, I have more respect for Justice Thomas than him; at least he does not hide his main agenda.

Year after year, this man has been elected Chief Judge, and year after year, he does nothing but put judges into courtrooms to destroy black people. We want to look at why there are so many young black men going to jail or being killed in the streets; well, all we have to do is look at the system that is in place to make sure that this takes place.

I think about the fact that Zion is living in a house that does not know love, with a psychologically crazy person, getting a less than perfect education. Someone said to me; he is getting good grades as he got A’s. Now, he gets those grades at a school that all you must do is put your name on your paper, and you get a C.

I wanted more for Zion; I wanted the world to be in his hand; I wanted this young man to want for nothing but to become all that his dreams could reach for. Now, all he can dream about is getting to the age of being able to speak, the age of being free from the prison he lives in. What a joke; someone said to me that he seems happy; if you talk to some of those young men lock up in jail for life, they seem happy as they know they are there for life, so why wear your pain on your shoulder.

COVID-!9 has taken the lives of over 260k in America; however, it just does not seem to take the life of a few that I can name and have. I told you all that I have hated; I am not your Negro, I am just as vengeful as the Jews that read about the stories of what their loved ones have to deal with at the hands of the Nazi. Well, Zion must deal with this same pain. To tell me that I need to forgive; well, I will do that when I am dead!

When you snatch a child's dream and make him or she must grow up faster, you make these young black men and women that many like to say seem much older than their age. If you had to live this life that many of them do, you would also be a 12-year-old walking about the problems of a 30-year-old on your back. I bet none of those that I have name wish what happen to Zion on their own Child, but I do!

KKK wear Black Now!

They must teach how to lie to become a judge; as I see that Judge Amy Coney Barrett says the same BS that Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan said, “it is not the job of a judge to legislate from the bench.”

I joke not that is the same bull she said as she was running for the appellate court. That is all she did and does; she allowed her personal hate for me as a black man to cloud her mind, and she used a little black boy to hurt me, and all those so-called Black Democrat in cook county did not say anything.

I see Judge Barrett as a young Susan Kennedy-Sullivan, and just because she has black children does not take away from anything, as many slave masters had black children, and they beat them just as they did the other slaves.

I do not trust Judges as they are no better than any other racist in a white sheet; they have on a black one and no hood. The fact that Judge Barrett will help destroy all those called rights that blacks, gays, and others have got over the years is a statement to what America is and will always be.

Many did not vote as they said what do they have to lose; well, I guess in time you all will see. I vote for judges that I know; I vote for judges that show me that they might be racist; however, they check the sheet at the door. Now, you do not have to be White to be racist; there are black and Hispanic judges that hate black men and women, just as much as the white one; Ask Chief Judge Evans.

The black men have become the whipping boy for all the ills in society; we are hated by all and loved by none. I have seen black judge sit back and say nothing; I wanted to ask some of them; are they a judge; as they pretend like they cannot speak, or did they have to check in their blackness at the door (as our first black President had to).

I have looked over the ballot and cannot find Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan's name on it I guess she had her husband called in one of his favor to keep her seat without running.  I am sure that someone knows Chief Judge Evans and I would like for you to ask him for me; at what point did he stop being a black man, and at what point did he start selling black men to Master?

I do not support him, and I see no difference I having him in that seat then a proud card carry member of the KKK; as I think about it; it might be better to have that KKK member as history did teach us that even them person found a way to change and stop hating blacks and apply the law. IE; Justice Hugo Black

Happy Born Day, Big Z.

 Happy Born Day, Big Z.

What more can I say that has not been said; today, Zion turns 14, and he is not allowed to call, text, or spend it with his family.

I do not care who it is; you cannot and should not make anyone stay where they are not happy. If you do, this person will grow to hate you as what you do to them is not out of love but out of your selfishness.

Joyce has forbidden Zion from calling us; she has mentally abused this young man it was done with the help of one DAVID GOTZH; CVLS and JUDGE SUSAN KENNEDY-SULLIVAN.

Now, this is a fact that when Zion was asked over and over where did he want to live, he said with the only mom and dad he knew and loved. He did not say this because he was young; he said this because he knew in his heart what true love is and was.

I keep saying time moves on, and what is being done to him at 14 cannot be done at 18. When young people run away from their homes or want to leave, we need to stop asking what is wrong with them and ask what is wrong at the place called “home.”

Joyce, I can you that when Zion finds out all that you did to him and the reason that you did it; he will HATE you. He will hate you as you destroyed his life; you were so jealous of that life that he had that you mouth the words out of your mouth “why does he get this, and I do not!” You wanted to know why Zion was getting to enjoy life; why he was getting b-day parties; why he had a life that you would never have.

I love each and all my children, and I can tell you any parents worth their weight wants more for their children than they have. I want each one of mines to never want; to never go without and to never want anything in life and not be able to get it. We preach education; we preached to the point that each one of them would tell you; they were going to college. We made sure that those around them were only going to uplift them, not show them a life of drugs and gangs.

It kills me to see so many young black boys that will never have a chance in life and to think that this what Joyce; David and Judge Kennedy-Sullivan wanted for Zion. I feel that I own Zion more; I owe him this because it was me that made sure he was born.

Zion will know how Joyce came to me wanted money to abort him; she was in a mental hospital trying to abort him, and it was a Christian one, and they would not do that. I did not give her the money for one reason and only one; I did not know her.

There is some cold facts, but they are the FACT. Do not have to take my world; Joyce told the GAL about this; she talks about how she was on the street having sex for money and found out that she had a child that she did not want. This young man came into this world for one reason and only one, and Joyce has been using him since that day.

I'll never forget the day in court when Zion was a baby, and Joyce told the Judge; we could have him, but she wanted the money. She wants to be called mom; shit it takes more than giving birth to a child to be called mom. Now, it is about Section 8 and link. Zion knows that Joyce does not love him like a mom; to this day, when you ask him, and he does not fear being beat, he will tell you who his Real Mom is.

Soon, he will be Free; Zion is not a child; he is 14, and he can choose to live the life that does; or walk away from it, which is why he is a prisoner. I do not lie about these facts as “it is what it is”!

Man 2 Man

 

I feel that you judge a man or woman by the person they married and whom they have children with, and as Zion anniversary on his birth approach, I can only judge the new guy in his life-based on the woman he is with.

When you lay up with a Delilah, you are what they say you are.  This guy is living off the back of Zion; he eats food paid for by link from Zion; he lives under a roof that is supplied for by Zion. As such, I ask the question, what type of man is, he?

Time will show everything as there is going to come to a point where Zion can stand up; man, up and speak for himself, and at that point, he will choose the right path. The crimes that have been done to this young man is not the first, and it will not be the last. Young black men are destroyed each day in the courtroom throughout American, and under Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan, that is more of the norm; than abnormal.

The fact is that I am free to speak my mind, and everything that I say is not only back up with a long paper trail; it is also well documented in legal drafts. I sent this young man a letter asking to speak with him as he stood there looking like a deer as Joyce was up in my face. He did not grab her; or pull her away; he just stood there, and I wanted to ask him why?

He decided to be with a woman that lies for a hobby, and I want to ask him what makes him think she is going to change; she is a viper that every man that has been in her life comes to knows. As a man, if you are with a woman and no one in her family talks or deals with her, and those who do are bottom feeders, what does that tell you about her? Her mother is crazy as a box of nuts, and she is on pill away from not taking to be the same.

I know that Zion's life now is one of food stamps and public aid, and it is a life that he never knew. For Zion, his birthday was one that he wanted all to have fun; he wanted to be around love; he wanted to have his sister and brothers there, and that boy loved gifts.

I sit and laugh about how his life uses to be and now to live in prison. I want to ask that man, why do you think Joyce will not allow Zion to talk to anyone of us; why does she punish him just because he wants to call his real mom and dad.

As a man, there is no way I can or could be with a woman like her, and I understand there are many men out there that do not care; you have these brothers out here that will lay down with dogs just to eat and sit up and say you ate the man of the house. Sorry but Trump is the man of that house as he is the only that gives you the link to eat; he is the one that gives you the sect 8 to have a roof over your head.

I understand that we as a race are in deep trouble, and most of that trouble is caused by self; it is true that the court fuck up Zion's life, but it was Joyce and Jaimie that put the gas on the fire to destroy yet another black boy. I know that Jamila has a son, and I only hope that the young man does better than from what he comes from. However, when your life is one of lies and living off the tit of the state; you tend to become an adult that lives the same path.

 I am going to keep those recordings as I want to let Zion listen to why she lied; I want him to hear why Jamila destroyed his life; for $110 in link; dam I could have given her that in cash to just tell the truth. For what I have been told and what I know, that is not her fabric as you are what you come from.

As I have said many times, life will kill you, or it will make you. For many young black men, life kills them. Our black boys do not have a chance in hell; they are being raised by mothers that destroy them, and fathers that do not know how to be a man. Racism is real; however, we gaslight much of the pain that within our communities. I will say this to that young man; Man 2 Man talks to me.

Captain of my Soul.

We are the master of our destiny and do not think that for one second or one minute that I have stopped hating David Gotzh or Judge Susan Kennedy Sullivan and Joyce and I still wish them pain in life and I would dance on their gravesite. You, all do not understand, I come from the soul of the real Jews, and I do not love or turn the other cheek and I only stay human because I know that time is on my side.

In ten days, Zion will be 14 and like life he will be able to make his own choices in life and one day he will be a man that will know the truth. Not the lies that have been told to him, or the mental brainwashing that he has been subject to; but he will know that I have been fighting for him; I have gone all the way to the high court in this state and as he knows I did it all for him.

Joyce's life is what it is and there is nothing in the world that will help her; she is and will always be a doormat to one man after another and for me she is nothing. She is the poster child for many women that have children for one reason and only one; to survive.

You see what David and Susan did was personal; it was 100% based solo on Race and Racism and to call her a judge or him a lawyer put a black stain on the terms. They are Child and baby killers. She used her husband coat tail to get to the court as she was not and is not legal smart enough to do it on her own.

David is and will always be a bottom page lawyer. It is people like him that make the good lawyers get a bad rap. As he uses his personal feeling for me to hurt Zion. Call him a man; I would not call him a little boy as he is not a man in my eyes. I think about how he talks to Zion about going to see the “Black Panther” and why would Zion want to see a movie like that.

WOW: this man works for CVLS and the state gives this group money to help blacks; it is no wonder our children are at the bottom of the bucket.

I speak my mind and I do not and will never bit my lip or backtrack on what I feel about those involved in that case and the only regret that I have is that I came back to this state thinking we would get a fair anything.  Now, when he gave my daughter address to Joyce, I did not post his home address and number on social media as I turn the other cheek.

I can tell you this; as a man, I would have beat him like a slave if he was man enough to go toe 2 toe with me. I am not the one; I am not their negro; I am not going to pray for them unless it is for pain in their life. I want to both to feel the pain we did; I want them both to feel the pain of having someone you love taking from you as to me that is JUSTICE.

Wow: you say, how could I have so much anger inside me; ask a Jew what they feel about a Nazi; ask them what they have done to those that caused pain to their love ones. Jews will dig up your bones just to kill you. Jews do not Play. 

What should I do; say that I have moved on; say that I have forgiven; say that what these people did to Zion was just about life. Sorry, I am not that House Nego; I am a real Run-A-way Negro that you can chop off both feet and I am going to run on my hands.

Riddle me this; those that have children; if someone hurts your child do you forgive them; do you walk away and pretend as if they did not? Or do you fight like hell to make them pay? Well, now you know what and why I feel the way that I do.  

Joyce is yet another reason I say to hell with Religious; she calls herself a Jehovah Witness; living with one little boy after another; sucking on the tit of the state of Illinois to live. Is that what “Real Witness” do?

“In the fell clutch of circumstance

    I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

    My head is bloody, but unbowed.

 

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

    Looms but the Horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

    Finds and shall find me unafraid.

 

It matters not how strait the gate,

   How charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate,

   I am the captain of my soul.”

CANCER!

At what point do we as black people investigate the person in the mirror and take responsibility for the conditions that we are in?

We have been conditions to look for help from everyone but self. What more can the government, your parents, or for that anyone do for you if you do not do shit for yourself? No one owes you anything, and this welfare mindset is one that only grows like cancer among black people.

Trump is the best thing that happens to black people, and another four years of him will be the best thing as we have cancer that needs to die off so that we can start over fresh and new. I do not understand how we love to talk about the white man and how he keeps his foot on our backs and I see educated black folks on here talking about how hard it is. It is only hard because you have become a mentally lazy person that thinks this government owes you something.

No one is going to save black people, as black people are not savable. I look at the young man who is 25 that shot at the police last week, and I say at what point did someone know that the young man was unsavable?

Yes, it is a fact that at some point, it does not make a difference what you do; you cannot save a person. I think about all that David Gothz and Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan did to Zion, and I ask myself who holds 100% responsible for what happened to him? Furthermore, it comes back to Joyce Washington and Jamia.

Both of them chose to lie in court for self-benefits; it was never about what is best for Zion; what is best to make sure that he makes it; have a life; growing up in a healthy home with people that love him. No, it was about what can I get from the government to help me, and for them, it was benefits of food stamps.

Now, I have no problem with anyone getting food stamps; what I have a problem with is when you get them to survey. I have been in this conversation with others about how white men benefit from the government more than anyone.

He does; however, he takes to them to build on what he has; not to live day-to-day. The government just cut the $500 unemployment, and I do not care; why?

For the past four months, many have been sitting at home, not doing shit but waiting on that link card or that check to hit. Where they out looking to make a job, but looking for a job, go out, and make a job. I was painting my porch yesterday, and I watch; I watch as the Hispanic men and women near me came home from doing some type of work; as the sister down the street was playing music and cooking on the front porch as her link just came in. The brothers next door had been sitting out since 6 am drinking cheap ass hot beer.

Now, what is wrong with those pictures? We just do not get it, and I am sorry those days of let us try are over; we are at the stage where we want a handout. I know the story; I know many of us feel that we are owed something for what our family did to build the US.; however, what are you doing now to keep building on it?

I am not one to say that anyone can make it; as sorry they cannot; you become what you know and what you know is a life of nothing. Education is the only way that a black person is going to stop living a life of hand-out. Black people do you know that we hand down link cards and section 8 to our children like that is something to be proud of. I see many talking about how they do not have a laptop so that their child can do their schoolwork; well, if your child does not have one, that is your fault.

You can find money to get high; you can find money to give to the shoe company; hair company, to any and all but you, cannot find money to invest in your own child; that is not the government's fault or job. We are a dam joke; our ex-slave master gave us a god and got our dumb ass up in churches prying for him to help us; shit helps yourself.

I look at the young man that is now dating Joyce and I have no respect for him, and to me, he is not a man. How in hell can you call yourself a man when you are living and eating on the life of a child. As a man, what you lay down with is what you are; the same goes for a woman. COVID-19 is doing what the government could not do; it is killing off people at a rate that only helps the economy.

Give any other group one year of free help and they are going to come out at the end of that year, making it on their own; we get ten years of free help, and we are looking for another 10. I do not know how we got to that point; what I do know is that in able to get rid of cancer, you have to kill it off so that it cannot grow; well, we have cancer.

In 2020 we are not going to vote in the numbers that we need, and once more, we are going to need the help of our ex-slave master children to save us, as we are like children and will not do for self.

If I am wrong, show me. I look at those in my own family, and I walk away from them as they are no better; they turned a blind eye as they have this same cancer.

Cream Always Floats

It has been some time since I have blogged.  COVID-19 and all the unrest in America have made it hard not to cry over what life Zion must be living. The last that we talked to or saw him was just before he graduated from 8th grade. Joyce's bipolar was on full force that day as she verbally attacked me and spat in my face. I filled a police report; however, just like Cook County...nothing was done.

If I had done to Joyce what she did to me, they would have locked me up on-site because Cook County is known for putting black men in jail. In that respect, it seems American is good at that.

Well, I had gotten Zion a laptop for high school and was going to send it to him; however, I made up my mind that I am not going to allow Joyce or anyone to keep playing games.

Zion needs so much, and it is deplorable that he is in a home with a woman that is still using her body to live and using Zion to get a Link for housing, then allowing another man to reside in said house. I never understood how a man could say he is the man of the house when it is a section 8 house. Alternatively, how he can say that he is a man when he is eating from a table that is paid for by Link in the name of a minor.

I think that our public aid system is a joke! Its primary purpose is to keep poor people in a poor mindset. So they do not have to work. The get Link and end up having many children.  So, I question what the motivation for anyone is to work and do better in life when doing such will cost them free housing and food.

I want to ask the Mayor of Chicago what her mission statement for the city is.  I see her talking about how the shootings and killings need to stop; however, I do not really think that she wants them to stop. Too many people are making money off these young black and brown boys killing each other. Trust me, not one of them wants to bring an end to the crime.

I want to ask the Cook County State’s Attorney Fox how it is that I file a police report, and nothing is done, but Joyce can spit in my face, and the police do nothing. Why call the police when it seems that their mission is to only arrest as many black men as they can.

Zion will get some public aid laptop or, I am sure, one of these so-called helps the poor give away laptops to black students with the hope that mothers like Joyce do not sell them. I know that this will pass. I know that one day Zion is going to reach an age that he is going to say enough is enough. He surrounded by people with no hopes or dreams.  He has to motivate himself since he does not have anyone in his life to push him.

He is around people that live off public help, and I understand that these big companies are the main ones getting public help. You need to understand the mindset, though; they get public help to make millions, not to get a Link to feed themselves with.

I was at that 8th-grade graduation and the only ones with masks on where the non-black teachers. I looked around and was just shocked at how in 2020, the slave mindset is still in full effect. I do not expect anyone to reach out to me and talk to me about this, because this is a conversation that they do not want to have.

I am going to end on this note.  I will be voting for Vice President Biden in this upcoming election; however, in my soul, I would love to see Trump win. In the next four years, Trump can do more to help black folks than Biden will. We need someone to come and just cut us off; take away all the public help and force us to do better... and yes, some will not make it, but the cream always floats to the top.

CHOKE ME OUT!

Today I was coming from a job in the city, and I stop to see if Zion school had their drive-by graduation and they were.

So I park my car down from the school and walk up as I did not want Joyce Crazy self to see me...

Well, I do not know how or who told her, as the only person I saw that knew me was Zion...

Well, I was on the other side of the school standing outside with others and 3 older sisters were standing near me.

Now, Joyce walked her ass over to me and go up in my face and spit on me; she started screaming at me, and those ladies ask her what was wrong with her.

Now, she did all this because she knows that I am not going to touch her as I do not hit women, just something that I do not do.

Next, she called 911 and was telling lies to them on the phone as she wanted them to come and Choke me out.

 Now, this was during graduation, and that just made it crazier.. There was a police car there with two female CPD as they were there to escort the students in their cars..

So 911 told her that it was a car there and she went over to them. I kept taking pictures as she told more lies to them.

After Zion's name was called, I walked over to the car and spoke with the officers, and I do not know what she told them besides telling lies that I had an OP on me, and they said they told her I do Not. ..

Now, what do I do; you see calling the police on Black men is not known just what White Women; sad as it is; black women have been doing this for years.. One thing that my dad told me that stands true today; any women that call the police on you; do not give a dam if you live or die..

I was in a fuck up mood; the police could have come, and that shit could have got south, but like I said, what can a black man do? 

I do not have ONE woman in my family that will check her; my Aunts, mother, and all others just let her do this; get into my face, spit on me, and wow… I started recording as it was not the first thing that came to my mind.

FYI, the picture of Zion was taking for me by one of those older ladies.. she took my phone and said she was going to get me a picture of my Son;  and she told Joyce to get out of the picture. Joyce did not know she was taking the picture for me.

Now I want you to tell me what this does for Zion; how is this mental healthy for him? It is not, and I keep saying over and over that Joyce is Bipolar; as you do not grow out of that, or overcome that. She was in my face like she has done something.

The seed was planted in Zion from Danny and me; we are the ones that made sure he has the best school, and his environment was where he could grow to be whatever he wanted to be..  What was done to this boy will do down in history how to destroy black boys.

Call the Police?

I was reading a story on someone page about calling the police, and I do not call them; I do not care what the reason or what is going on; I do not call the police as I do not trust them; black, white, brown, or yellow; they all police to me.

True story, when Joyce attack Danny in my house I called the police and I was arrested and taken to jail; everyone in my house knew the truth, but I was still taking to jail and when I asked the Black officer why I was going to jail; his words to me I shit you not; because I was the only man at the house.

Next true story, I made a complaint on that office, and he and a white one made my life a living hell I still filed more complaint. I was pulled over by the white one and was taken to jail for having an Illinois driving license with the name Mahdee Muhammad on it.  Once more, I shit you not, I was charged with having a fake ID. They said I had not legally changed my name.

They pull over was on some bullshit and I got sick during the stop, and per the ambulance driver, the officer and other police were talking about how he needed to justify the pullover. I told you all about the black officer that was not only his supervisor; however, he is a member of Alpha Phi Alpha Frat Inc. (that I had personal dap months before)

They all stood there and made up something to charge me with, and that was the story this is the story they came up with. The officer saw me pulled over sick, and he was there to help me and found out I had a fake ID. If this were not 100% real, some would say that I was making this up.

I had to go to Markham court seven different times over a year before the State of Illinois drops the case.  I had my birth record, my passport, and school record and legal document all to show my name is Mahdee Muhammad, and none of that made one dam difference They only drop the case because they could not get the officer to come to court.

This story is one of the many bullshits I had to deal with when it came to Joyce and the case with Zion and a dirty cook county police, black and white.  For these reasons, I do not call the police as I do not trust them. One of my bros asked the question since he is a police officer now and does that make him different now; for me, that would be a Yes.

You see, I know many police; shit I have one that is like a brother to me, and I know in my heart, in the end, he is police and when on the line, will he support me or his so-called brother in blue and I do not know. What I do know is that I am a black man in America, and I am always going to be one, and for that reason alone, my life is not worth a bucket of warm piss.

The sad part of all this is the fact that as a black man, I fight with black women and men about being black and how I need to forget and forgive as life is too short. I am one black man that does not fear the brothers on the street; I fear those who are police and who think they are not black anymore.

As these black folks do not think they are black anymore; they have somehow overcome their blackness

I get more help from non-black than blacks people; I have more non-black that feel my pain as to many that look like me feels that I need to forget; wow, let that sink in! When you or anyone question my blackness, just know that I will never forget that I am a field negro,

I do not pretend or do I want to be a house negro; as in the end, we all are still just Negros in Master's eyes.

Where are the Black Fathers at?

As I review all these stories in the news about black men being kill, I keep asking the question, where are the fathers at?

We have a problem, and it is nothing new; there are too many young men coming up without a father or father type in their life.

I have been going over in my mind how do I address all the bullshit with Zion; I have done my best to bit my lip and keep my feelings to myself; however, it is about time that I make this clear.

There is nothing; not one thing in this world that is going to keep me from having a father to son talk with Zion when he turns 14 in August. The games that have been played with this young man are criminal in nature and sick in others. Zion is living in a house of prison, and he will know that he does not have to live that way.

To have him begging for love, to want to see his family, and to be lied to time after time breaks my heart. Zion graduated from 8th grade, and he is going to high school in the city, and we are going to get him a laptop and some clothes (he does not and should not have to beg or get anyone hand out cloths). I was told to take the laptop over to someone's house, and Zion might get his birth mother to takes him to get it.

I said HEL No! I am going to send it to him or put it in his hands and let him know do not let anyone take it or sell it. Enough is enough and too much cause the cycle of crazy to never stop. I see and hear about what is being done and how people in my family walk on eggshells as to just see his face or hear his voice is enough for them to pretend this shit is healthy for him.

Fact: Zion had his childhood stolen from him and like it or not; he is about to be a man, and I can live with what I have and will do for him. I do not look back over the years and have any regret as I did all in my power to make sure that he had a life.

I watch his great-grandfather and great-grandmother go crazy; I saw personally how his grandmother would think that she talks to dead people and was not shocked when she was committed to a mental hospital.

What did these people think; that Zion was not going to grow up, that he was going to eat the lies told to him. Like those lock up, he had to survive; he had to play the game, and just as anyone that is held against their will, he had to survive.

Our ex-slave master destroyed black people, and we have allowed their children to do it to us. I only want my children to be better than I; I want them to reach for the starts on my back. In the 14 years of Zion's life, Joyce has cost my family and I over $200k, and I am never going to forget or forgive her. What she did to Zion was never done in love; she does not know how to love as she was never taught what love is.

We have to stop this cycle, I bit my lip about the bullshit that my family has done to me; I bit my lip about the fact that I did not put my hand on David, he wanted me to be a nigga and lay hands on him, and I did my best to let the white man laws do my fighting, and that was dumb for me to think that laws written for him could be used for me.

Let me be clear as I can; we do not have a justice system; that is justice for black people; history shows that we, the ex-slaves, keep looking for justice from a group of people that hate us. My soul cries for my people as I know we are sick, and we are not going to get the help that we need.

I was talking to someone about hate, and they were saying to me that I should forgive those that have caused me harm. I told them BULL; I am a black Jew, and like my Jewish brothers, we do not forget or forgive. I take my hate to the grave.

Do you see clear folks saying they forgive those that do them wrong; hell no; they made a death penalty just for them. Dr, West said it best; Clear folks better be happy that black folk do not do onto them as they did onto us.

However, it will come a day that we will seek a tooth for a tooth!

Broken Dreams

When you were a baby, I gave you my word that I would love and protect you from harm as if you were from my seed; I told you that I would make sure that you were always treated the same, and if you wish for it, it would be yours.

I am sorry that I was not able to keep my promise as I trust a system that I knew was never made to give a black child a chance.  I allow a person to get their hands on you as their only thought was and is always how they can survive. And if they had to live a life of poverty, you should have to live one also.

What is the love of a parent if they do not wish more for their child; what is the love of a parent if they have jealousies in their heart and soul for a child that they birth; as lies can be told over and over but the trust is one that sees its way into the light. 

I gave all the men in my family my world that you would grow up to break a cycle that many who came before you were not able. The cycle of not having a father in your life that loves you; the cycle of not being able to do the little things like play baseball; and growing up in a house under the thumb of a government program.

I can talk about what the numbers show; however, what are numbers as it is those that will say they are not valid. I can talk about what life is like to grow up poor; however, that is a life that I personally do not know.

So, what can I talk about?  I will make sure that when you become a man, you know the truth. I will make sure that you know you know why you were robbed of your youth.  You will understand why you became a tool used for section 8, the day that I gave my life so that you could have one, the day that racism was so intense that these so-called laws of justice were blind, you will know that on 5/30 that you were stolen from your family like a slave.

I am not going to bit my lip or tap dance around the truth I am not going to sit here and play nice just to stroke the ego of a crazy person, I will never forget or will I forgive what they did to you and why. As a young man, you should never have to see the things that you are going through now. No young black man should. You are and have become a stat, one that says that you will be in jail or dead by the time you reach 18th.

Your life will never be the same; you will not get the chance to see things the same way; you will not get the opportunity to live out your dreams. You now live a life that is based on the first of the month. Your health now is cover by a state that does not care about you as they only see a future DOC draft choice. I dare anyone to say that these numbers are a lie; let someone tell me that your odds in life were made better by the decision of a racist.

My soul is substantial, as I knew never to bring you back to this state. I was told that justice is not and will never come from here; fight for you in the south. You had a better chance at life in a state where those that came before you were slaves than in one where so-called free men walk. 

You wanted so much from life, and you had a family that was going to do all that they could to make sure that you have it, but I fail to keep you safe. I allowed you to be sold on the slave block as the Judge said that was the life you will live now.

I play over and over in my mind what I could have done differently; what could I had done to keep you safe and as a man that keeps me up at night unable to sleep, as I see the life that you live. I understand that no one gives a dam about you, as they only see you for what they can get from you. No child should be the life support of their parent. No young man should become the man of the house. I am sorry that you have been put into that position.

You now live in a concrete jungle, one that is made like a jail, your phone calls are monitoring like those young men in the other world locked-up, as you are living in prison; and in a house that is set up for you to end up in real one.

You are a smart young man, and I am sure that you have learned to survey as you told me you were going to have to do. You know that it is better to play dumb than to be smart, as being smart will get you called names, or cost you your life.

I might not know a lot, but what I do know is what it is like to grow up to learn that the person who talks about how much they love you; lied to you. I understand why your mom doesn’t speak as she needs those 5 min calls to make it. I would refuse to talk to you that way. I was told lies as a young man that sounded good, but I became a man; and I will never forgive those that lied, as I am sure you will never.

I give you my word, and my word is bond that before I leave this earth, I will never let those that put you into this place of hell forget what they did to you. You have about four more years max, and one with good behavior and you will be FREE from your bondage as you can seek early release. 

Operation "Bayonet"

Forgiveness is something that is not for me to give, and it is not something that I will do. I am up reading about how the Nazi hunters would travel the earth looking for anyone that profit or help to destroy Jews. I ask this question for those that tend to forgive so easy, and they also just happened to be the descendants of slaves; why?

Have you all been that brainwashed into a feeling that it is your “God” that taught you or told you that it is better to forgive, as I have read the bible and I have not been able to find those words. I did come across the lyrics that talk about an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth; however, I miss that slap my face, and I turn the other cheek part. As brother Malcolm talks about this, and I will sum it up, slap my face, and I will break your hand.

Well, what was done to Zion; what was done to my family was more than a slap in the face; It was and is a Judicial Lynching, and I am not their “God,” nor am I in the position to forgive anyone of them. I am more like Simon Wiesenthal, and less like a Booker T. Tell me that something terrible has happened to one of those that stood in a courtroom using that so-called justice to lynch me; I am going to smile and sip me some tea

Life or death is all that we have, and what we do in the middle is on us. What David Gotzh did was brag to me about his German background. He was proud to let me and others know that I was nothing but a nigga to him, and Zion was nothing but bait use to go nigga hunting. Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan brag about how she could use her powers to lynch me in the courts, and I had no ability to do anything about it.

When this is over, and at some point, the government will say that it is; I am not going to go away; I am not going any dam where. I told them, and I made it clear; I am going to take this fight to my grave. The powers that be do not give a hoot if you all live or die as you are nothing but a number on a sheet of paper; the sad part about this is that when this is over, I wonder how many of you keep on being just a number.

I say do some reading into history and understand how the church and a fear of “God” were used to keep blacks in a mental slave state. To this day, many of you are still in that mindset; we have these so-called Negro leaders who have one job, and that is to keep one foot on our backs to keep up in place. These so-called slave catchers, as the real ones look like the same slaves they were catching, are used to keep black people down.

We tend to look at these young folks and question why and how; they are walking about as if they have nothing to live for; no, they understand that at one date and time, they are going to leave this world, and they are never coming back. Well, I know that also, as such, I have to do all in my power to make sure that no other black child or man is lynch like Zion and my family was. Wake up and understand that It is your “God” job to forgive, not mines! And, I sure in hell, do not forget.

I am still here! Operation "Bayonet”

Million-Dollar Blocks

The million-dollar block is where CVLS David Gotzh said was an up and coming block that would give Zion the life that he needed and deserved. Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan, under the supervision of Chief Judge Evans has spent years making sure that young black boys like Zion help to make sure that more million-dollar blocks are made.

What is a million-dollar block? Millions allocated to incarcerate residents on individual city blocks. In Chicago, over five years from 2005-2009, there were: 851 blocks with over $1 million committed to prison sentences 121 blocks with over $1 million committed to prison sentences for non-violent drug offenses.

79th and Essex are one, and this is where they sent Zion to live. I know that for many of you, this is something that is hard to understand as you feel that this issue does not affect you. That is until you are looking down the other end of a gun, and you ask yourself how? We have a court system in place in cook County that has one purpose; that is to lock up and send as many young black males downstate. 

If these were not black boys, something would be done; if you took the time out of your day to go and spend one hour in a courtroom, you would see that judges like Susan Kennedy-Sullivan are not trying to help as these same judges have stock in the prison system.

Nowhere is this nation is the schoolyard to prison pipeline clearer than in Chicago:

Not only are the highest incarceration rates concentrated on the city’s west and south sides, but this spatial unevenness has held constant for more than two decades. 1 As a result, most urban residents with felony convictions come from and return to a small number of neighborhoods. The impact on residents is dramatic. In parts of Chicago’s West Side, nearly 70 percent of men between ages 18 and 54 are likely to have been subject to the criminal justice system

What does Chief Judge Evans has to say about this; nothing; as he has for over one-year, refuse to talk with me about this; and since no one in the so-called media cares enough to ask the critical question this goes unchecked.

Slaver has not ended as these young men of color are sent back down to the southern part of the state as these small towns make they're living off the backs of young blackbucks.

The reason we have a probate court for minor was to help keep these young people out of DCFS and out of the systems. However, under Judges like Susan Kennedy-Sullivan, over 80 percent of black males that go through the probate court end up at some point in their life going into DCFS and the DOC system. Over 80 percent, that is a system that is and will keep on failing as it was never set out to succeed. 

If you want to read more about this and if you think this is not real check out the https://chicagosmilliondollarblocks.com/

As you will see that when a young man pulls up in a car and unload 20 rounds into a store; these young men are a product of cook county probate court; under Chief Judge Evans; and highly unqualify judges such as Susan Kennedy-Sullivan and lawyer like CVLS David Gotzh are tools used to keep the constant cycling of black men in and out of prison in neighborhoods like the block were Zion was sent to live.

Raciest Judges

The sad part is that this is not new, and it has been going on for some time. I talk about David Gotzh and Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan and how it is a fact that David is a racist, and he has no problem using the word nigga or talking about black folks like that were as he called them “gang-banger thugs”!

You see, to be a lawyer with CVLS and a racist is OK; after all, when I beg CVLS to take him off Zion case, they just up the game and told him not to stop until he destroys that little black boy. Now, Good old Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan talks about how the life of education and making something out of your life is not the life for little black boys. No, for her, it is jail and the grave.

I'm not too fond of the fact that we live in a society where race is more important than anything else, where the first thing anyone sees when they look at me is my skin. That saying that my skin is my sin is so true. Can I wake up one day and not be in my skin; can I wake up one day and the world sees me a White man. Where I a not pre-judge or have to worry about having my life taking away just because my skin is not light enough.

On February 27, 2020, I go before a cook county judge in the 6th district as CVLS has done all that they can to keep what they did to Zion in the dark. They have hired one of the best law firms in the state to fight me; that is right; I am no one, I am just a black man that can read and write. And some years ago, that fact alone would have got me killed. Today it got me lynched in Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan courtroom as she said to me, I think I am so smart as she taught me what they do to smart nigga in cook county courts.

If I were a fly on the wall, I would love to see what David Gotzh and CVLS said about me in emails and text, as that is why they are fighting so hard to keep my case from seeing the light. To read the emails, to get a look into the racist world of cook County probate court and see how young black boys are sold each week to the highest bidder.

Judge Leblanc is just one of many that sit on a bench with hate inside of them for others; this hate is only based on race. You see, a racist with no power hurts no one but themselves; however, those like David Gotzh and Judge Kenney-Sullivan and Judge Leblanc can hurt many young blacks’ boys and girls that cannot fight for self.

Many do not know that there is a difference in being a racist and being prejudice; the critical factor is power; one has the power, and the other does not. As such, I am just a spider on the wall, and I fight an uphill battle to bring some light into cook county probate court as there are too many black folks that know what is going on; but they are making too much money to say anything.

Butterfly Effect.

Watching the Hernandez story, I do not get all the gay points as besides the high school person, there is no one to say that they were with him or that he was gay, and that has nothing to do with this story.

Now, what does is the fact that I talk and live by the butterfly effects; it is only one thing or one second or one point in your life that will or can change your life forever. His father died at a point where it changed his life forever, and it was at that point all the things that happen in his life was going to be.

I speak over and over about Zion and how it was just one; only one person that changes his life for life. David Gotzh! This man came into Zion's life and changed his life in a way that was not good. I wonder how he would had felt if ARDC had taken his law license from him. How would that hand change his family life; would he be able to live the life that he lives now; would his children have the life they have now?

I speak about Zion and how this young man had a gift, and that was his love for baseball, and it was our job to make sure that he was able to be the best that he could; it was our job to make sure that not only did he have that; also education had to be there. I get so mad when I think about how Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan spoke about how educated Zion is, and she still chooses to send him to live in hell.

I see it so many times; how young black and brown boys have their lives destroyed by a system that is not and was never put in place to help them. Tell me this; how cook county probate or for that any court in American helps them. Locking up young black and brown boys do not help them as there is no system in place to help them.

I know that I have this uphill fight. I know that I am only a fly on the wall as I must fight a system that makes millions off black and brown boys. There is this meme going around about the fact that police do not want crime to go down; doctors do not want people to stop getting sick, and those that make their living off the jails do not want people; esp. black and brown boys/men to stop getting lock up.

I say take any young non-black or brown child and put them into some of the positions that children like Zion must live in now and tell me how their life will be totally different. What makes David children any better than mines, RACE! The issues with Zion and all these other throws away, children are all about race and how raciest do not see them as being equal to theirs.

I fight this battle not to prove a point; it is not about the money; it is about bringing an end to a system that is and has been in place too long. CVLS knew that they have a racist working under their wings, and all they cared about was how can they destroyed another black child. I know that my stories are the same as many others; I know that most if not all of you all don’t care as these young men story do not affect your life; never forget the butterfly effect.

AKA

We do not have a justice system in American; let’s look at the trump hearing and think about how some lost their dam minds about the fact that to them, OJ got away with murder, and for them, he was and will be the face of injustice. Let that shit sink into your head. OJ, let’s not think about the men that killed a little black boy in Mississippi, or for that all the black folks that have been lynched since there was an American.

Let’s not think about slavery as that was not personal; just business; case after case where someone has taken the life with tons of witness and just walk. Or how about all these black men that walk out of jail and off death row for crimes they did not do. Let this shit sink in; for everyone that walks outs, there are a 100 that did not.

If it is one thing that the Trump hearing will teach the world that is in America, there is no justice system and never has been. This is the land where they burned women that they thought were witches; I was looking at something, and it was the founder of PETA on there talking about how wrong it is for the government to used animals in labs. Since the history of time, black people were used beforehand.

It was only after (if it every stop) there was a push to stop using black folks in the medical test did they start using animals. However, some say use little black baby and not the little rats. We are one sick as country, and it never shocks me that we pretend that our shit does not smell.

On October 10, 2018, I walk into a Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan courtroom as we were having a hearing on Zion. The night before I was on Facebook talking to Jamila (my cousin lying daughter), she was telling me how she came to court and told lies. Now, she only admitted this after she said something to me that I knew for a fact was a lie. She said that David Gotzh, AKA the Road Lawyer, AKA the Racist Lawyer, knew that she was telling lies.

Now Fact Judge Susan Kennedy-Sullivan knew that she was telling lies; however, she made it 100% clear to me that she did not care when she said to me in open court; “she does not care who lies” she does not like or trust me. As such, everyone was allowed to come to court and lie, and in the end, Zion was removed from our home.

Now, I was told that was going to happen; I was told that the courts in cook county are dirty; the funny part was it was a lawyer in the deep south that told me this; A White one at that. He knew that in cook county that the judges and court system was one where there is no justice. I want you to let this sink into your head. Now, just think about where is it that all this black man is getting out of jail?

Most of those that are getting out are in so-called liberal northern (back in the day free states) parts; is there something to this? Many want to say to me that having a black person in changes in the justice systems will help. Well, it sure does not and did not help all those black folks in cook country as black men are still making up over 80% of those locks up.

Let me be clear; when a police officer, anyone working in the criminal justice system, from the judges to the lawyers tells you that they want to bring down the crime numbers, they are telling you a dam LIE. That is like a cancer Dr. saying they want to bring an end to cancer; bull shit; no one wants to bring an end to how they make their money.